ONE MILE AT A TIME

September 15, 2023...

I am in Middle of Nowhere, New Hamphsire and am just about to start my first of 3 runs as co-captain of a 208ish mile, 12 person relay. I will be running every 8-10 hours and will log a total of 20 miles over one weekend. This will be my 4th relay of this kind, and normally I am brimming with excitement for the adventure, effort, and lunacy sure to await me and the LLAMAS IN A FUGUE STATE WEARING HATS team. But as I stand at the start, waiting for Eric to "pass the baton", my mind is anything but excited. I'm actually freaking out.

You see, I didn't train for the relay. And when I say I didn't train, I am not being "modest". I am being literal.

Not 1 mile.

I had all of the good, aspirational intentions of preparing myself properly for this event. I knew how to train. I had just spent 6 months training for and then completing my first marathon, the Big Sur Marathon, the previous year. (Bucket List Item!) But work, life, and a little bit of depression drew me away.

So here I am, 30 seconds away from the point of no return, a swirl of anxious thoughts... and BOOM, a slap bracelet is wrapped around my wrist, and ready or not, I'm off.

*****************

I don't remember anything about the first mile or two of run #1. It was a haze of distraction and worry. Thank the Universe! at mile 3, my shoe laces came untied or I would have spend the rest of my run worried about the rest of my run. It wasn't that I needed a break (HAHA), but since I'm safety girl, the integrity of my gear came first and I immediately stepped off the course. I sat on the picnic bench, charmingly appointed by a babbling brook. As I bent to double knot my sneaks, my senses were drawn to the flowing brook. I paused to listen and soon my eyes slowly took in the scene before me.

It was a stunner. Seriously Stunning.

And I had missed 2 miles of it, because I was focusing on what might happen this weekend, and what I didn't do leading up to today...very little of which I could do anything about. I'd like to say that I thought about the Reiki Principles right then and there...You know...Just for Today...but all I could focus on, as I tied my shoe was how I was going to get through the next 11 minutes (that's how long it takes me to run a mile), and then the 11 minutes after that, and so on...

I decided that I needed to inject a bit of joy into the moment if I was going to turn the tide for this run and the 2 to follow. Our team's ethos is to always have fun and do our best and not worry about competition. I took this to heart, and as I picked myself up and started a shuffle which turned into a jog, I gave myself an opportunity to see what was right in front of me that would bring a smile to my face and get me through the next 11minutes. I'd worry about the next mile when it came around.

I stopped to pet every dog that passed my way, cheered on every person who passed me, took silly and sweaty selfies, and spoke positively to myself. I became my own cheerleader on those 8.9 miles through the woods. I reminded myself that while I may not have run the miles I wanted to, I cross trained my butt off teaching numerous fitness and yoga classes since Big Sur. My body is miraculous and capable and has muscle memory from the marathon. I could do this! As the miles drifted by, the worries faded right along with them. I finished that leg and took each of the successive legs as their own magical experience.

December 4, 2023...

As I look forward to a 2024 Relay (for which I do plan to train!), I can take that Principle with me to each and every starting line to come.

"You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry; Don't worry.

And be sure to smell the flowers along the way."

-Walter Hagen

I found an opportunity to smell a flower at 4:30am… about 7 miles into my overnight run!

While not consciously aware of it, I believe the Reiki Principle "Just For Today, I Will Not Worry" brought me back to where I wanted to be with a perspective that served my ultimate success and happiness and a perspective that supported the success and happiness of the team. While I do not think that running a relay can compare with all of the worries that many face in our world today, I do believe that taking each day to release what we cannot control is a powerful act of love. This love reminds us that we have the privilege of nurturing our own well being, and that we can take that practice one day at a time or even one mile at a time.

LLAMAS IN A FUGUE STATE WEARING HATS at the finish line of Ragnar Reach the Beach 2023